The Flying Pork Apparel Co.

For those about to be Porked, I salute you.  

For those that have already been Porked... thank you. Very much.

I've been intensely fielding all of your correspondence, and here is what has shaken out... hope this information helps. If this page doesn't help, reach out to, and I will get you squared away.


How long will it take to ship my order?

Under normal circumstances, your item(s) will take between 1-2 weeks to ship out, but the strange events of 2020 have slowed the supply chain considerably. Your order might go out in a week, but it might take as long as a month or two. I hate that this is the reality, but that's the deal for now.

The blank shirt warehouses are having trouble keeping things in stock. Even worse, when an item goes out of stock, it takes a long time to re-stock... several weeks, even months. It's awfully frustrating.

I am always looking for a work around to minimize this problem, but it's usually pretty futile. If you find yourself waiting a long time for your stuff, do not hesitate to reach out to me, Brad Lark, at I'll get you squared away as best I can.

Bottom line... if you order something from me, you WILL get it. Eventually. Your understanding is immensely appreciated.


Where in the world will Flying Pork Apparel ship, exactly?

Well... the world is exactly where I will ship. Just pretty-please be patient. International shipping times vary, and most of the time, I cannot provide a tracking number in this situation. On the bright side, no one has had any complaints thus far, and my lovely Flying Pork Products have exported to many exotic places such as South America, the United Kingdom, Germany, Australia, Japan, several military bases... and even CANADA!

So order away, good people of Earth... if I encounter a problem on my end, I will reach out and keep you in the loop. If I can't figure out a solution, of course I will refund you in full. I love you guys, and I want you pleased as punch.


What are the bust sizes (widths) of your shirt sizes?

Here is the sizing chart for most of the shirts I use. Please understand that measurements may vary a smidge. Fabric does weird stuff sometimes.

Unisex Poly/Cotton blend tee measurements...

width 16.5 in. 18 in. 20 in. 22 in. 24 in. 26 in. 28 in.
height 26 in. 28 in. 29 in. 30 in. 31 in. 32 in. 33 in.

Unisex 100% cotton crewneck and ringer tee measurements...

width 15 in. 16.5 in.
18 in.
20 in.
22 in.
24 in.
26 in.
28 in.
height 25 in. 26 in. 28 in. 29 in. 30 in. 31 in. 32 in. 33 in.

 Unisex 100% cotton 3/4 sleeve jersey tee measurements...

width 15.5 in.
17.5 in.
19.5 in.
21.5 in.
23.5 in.
25.5 in.
height 28 in. 29 in. 30 in. 31 in. 32 in. 33 in.  34"

 Women's poly/cotton blend, crew- and v-neck tee measurements...

width 16 in. 16.5 in. 17.5 in. 18.5 in. 19.5 in. 20.5 in.
height 24.5 in. 25 in. 26 in. 27 in. 28 in. 29 in.

 Women's 100% cotton v-neck tee measurements...

width 16 in.
16.5 in.
17.5 in.
18.5 in.
19.5 in.
20.5 in.
height 24.5 in. 25 in. 26 in. 27 in. 28 in. 29 in.

 Women's poly/cotton blend racerback tank measurements...

width 13.5 in.
14.5 in.
15.5 in.
16.5 in.
17.5 in.
18.5 in.
height 26 in. 27 in. 28 in. 29 in. 30 in. 31 in. 



What is the official Flying Pork exchange/return policy?

Need to return or exchange something? Don't worry... we'll get it done. Get the ball rolling by contacting me at, but please read below as well.

If your shirt is too small or too large, I can exchange your item within 14 days of purchase. Please send a photo of the garment tag to Once everything checks out, I'll get you squared away. If you wait too long, no exceptions. No deal.

If you are just not happy with your item, return it within 7 days of receiving, and I'll refund you for everything aside from shipping costs.

To set a return or exchange in motion, please send your item back to the address below, and inform me whether it is an exchange or a return. You must get the same design for exchanges, and returns will be processed within 24 hours, most likely.

The Flying Pork Apparel Co.
attn: Brad Lark
6325 Glade Av.
Cincinnati, OH  45230-2711

Once Flying Pork Apparel receives your lightly-used item, we will send your replacement item within a couple-few days, or issue your reimbursement of the cost of the item(s) to be returned (shipping costs will not be refunded).

Flying Pork Apparel is happy to honor this policy on international orders, but we must insist that you, the customer, pay for all shipping charges to get your item-to-be-returned/exchanged back to us. We understand that sometimes customs policies are a bit ridiculous... we're sorry we can't do more here.


Can I get this design on a different shirt?

This is a possibility, but it doesn't work every time. One-off custom tees are processed as a custom order, and start at $30 per shirt. Kindly email to get the ball rolling on this sort of thing.

I have researched the heck out of the shirts we use for our designs... pairing the right color, with the right design, on the right fabric, with the right printing/pressing process. It's a surprisingly precarious combination that often requires a LOT of research and trial/error, and little room for wiggle when it comes to changing one thing.

So basically... reach out. Ask! I may be able to accommodate you.


Can I pick up my order, if I live in the Greater Cincinnati (OH) Area?

Unfortunately, due to legal, safety and time management issues, we cannot allow customers to come to the shop and pick up their orders at this time. Reeeeaally sorry... we're trying to figure out a way to accommodate this.


How do custom orders work?

Custom orders are very doable, and done very often. I can print your design for you, or I can help you with a design and get that onto a garment. All within my wheelhouse.

Kicking off production on a custom order just requires a credit card payment taken over the phone for the full amount quoted to you. This is done using a Shopify POS (Point-of-Sale) app that allows us to ring up orders offline. This application is provided to Flying Pork Apparel by Shopify, who happens to be our website hosting company. We have used this app several times already... zero complaints.


What the heck is a Virtual Merch Booth?

So... if you like, you can pay a yearly fee, and become a beloved client. I will set up a small store that lives on the Flying Pork site. This store contains shirt designs for your company or entity. All designs must meet Flying Pork Apparel standards, though. I've got a brand and company image to maintain.

I can take care of everything... creating designs... managing approvals... producing the actual garments... customer service... quality control... shipping... handling... social media bumps. All you really need to do is help us with social media posts, and kindly retweet/share/repost when you see something from us posted on your behalf.


FAQ pages do not always hit the subject about which you inquire... I absolutely get that. That's why I have an email address... Use it... I want you folks to be satisfied, not frustrated. Thanks for all the support thus far... I just love alla you. A lot.

Get Yer Pork On.

Thanks for visiting The Flying Pork Apparel Company. We're proud Cincinnatians feebly attempting to spread the joy... in t-shirt form. Please root around our site, and we hope to put a smile on your snout. Oink. Totally.

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